Updates anyone?

Well I just wanted to refer all my old followers to my newest blog!

http://therealworldofkurt.wordpress.com/

Now you get to hear about my crazy plans for life hehe

One Year Anniversary

Well one year ago I left on this day to begin my journey into the land of Germany. I had no clue what to expect, but anything I could have expected would never equal up to what it was. My time there was amazing and as always there are many to thank. In general my friends here and in Germany and my family both here and my host family. Both groups made my journey possible and I am indebted for life for that. If it weren’t for my amazing host family and friends in Germany I wouldn’t be writing this blog. This blog will finally cover my entries from when I first began to think of my trip home. I won’t describe it because well you’re going to get a face full of it now.

12/14/08
It was a great weekend. I stayed both Friday and Saturday night at Justin’s house so it was, of course, an awesome weekend. Even though it was awesome the thoughts and feelings that my time here is so limited are always plaguing me. I’ve made such great friends here and well a whole new life…the one I’ve always wanted. I’ve never been happier. Yet, I have to leave it and because of my stupid decision not to take my math credit in my Junior year and because of the fact that my school won’t accept a foreign credit. I only need a math class and that is why I have to go home. The thoughts of having to go home…or back to my other home…plague me. I dream…or more over I have nightmares. I miss my friends back home, but my life is so great here…I know that they would want me to stay here forever if I’m happy. Even this weekend both Friday and Saturday I had dreams about my return home and neither were comforting. I can never describe my feeling good enough to truly give you the idea. Every time I think of January 11th my stomach drops. I don’t ever want to leave my dream life…but I must.

12/15/08

Last night was rough after that last entry. I cried. I cried for what I will miss and for all I’ve going to lose. I cried for what I have to go back to. Life here is carefree, a dream. After my homesickness passed I wasn’t ever really sad and never really was mad. Life here has been almost perfect. Sure there are those days you get in small tussles with people, but never anything that lasts. I have been completely happy. Now I’ve entered my last month here and the emotions are overloading. I’m trying to enjoy myself as much as possible, but as I’ve said in every entry the impending end is overbearing. You know every time I write one of these I just repeat what I’ve always written, but I guess it only shows how I feel every day. The fact that my friends here don’t want me to leave only makes it worse. These people, my friends, have done so much for me that I will never in my life be able to give enough thanks. Before I ever left for Germany the fear was always…well what if I don’t get along with my Host Family and what if the people there don’t accept me…they certainly took that and turned it around. They have made this dream truly come true here. Because of them I’m happy. You see, the way I see it isn’t like I was just any old new student to take under wing. They took me in understanding that well sometimes we were gonna have problems talking and so on, but they did it anyways. The accepted me and helped me through the rough times and knew that no matter how good of friends we became, I would leave. Never the less they have made this time a once in a lifetime experience. Never Never Never ever will I forget the memories I have made here with my friends and host family. This is one reasons I’m having a hard time coping with having to leave. These friends and I ave a special bond unlike at home. Friendships made with the understanding that I would leave and in spite of that we became great friends. I don’t think I can truly describe how I feel about these friendships. I can only say that they are extraordinarily special and because of this I don’t want to leave them. I don’t wanna leave them or anything here. Oh I forgot to mention this is my last Monday here at this school. Yeah that never helps that,well, I start counting my ‘lasts’ now. My last full week of school is this week and today is my last Monday. Then there are people that I’ve already seen for perhaps the last time. This never helps. The one day that i just never want to come is January 10th. The day I have to say goodbye to my friends here. I know its going to be one of the hardest days I’ve ever had in my life. The day I have to say goodbye…the last day I’ll see some of my closest friends in the world. I don’t know when I’ll see them again and that hurts. Then after the pain of leaving my wonderful life here i have to return to my old life. Where do I even start to begin to express my feelings about returning. Well, first let me sat that I do miss my friends and family. Although there are the things back home that I was once numb to that I could, for the most part, ignore. Here in Germany I’ve learned how to live again. In Germany I learned how a family should be. Now that I have to go home I know that, well. that these things I’ve learned about won’t be there. My daily life will turn from the carefree and happy to the stressed and worried. Sure you might say “Well toughen up, that’s life,” but I simply say why does it have to be. All in all I really just don’t want to go home. I’m not ready to go home. My life here just started and now it’s ending too soon. Have I ever told you guys how much I hate school? Well I do and mainly because of this. Oh well there’s nothing I can do now,but prepare for the end of this wonderful life.

12/16/09

So today is already better than yesterday because I slept better and so far I haven’t remembered any dream related to home. I guess I’m beginning to come to terms with the whole thing. I try to think of positive things I can’t wait for back home…one being, seriously, Dance Dance Revolution. I swear the moment we’re near Harbison on the way home I’m asking to go to Frankie’s Fun Park no matter how tired I am. Of course, I’m also excited to surprise my friends and to see Kaci at the airport. I know its been hard to keep the secret from the others,but I really am glad she has. If i get the schedule I want then that’s also something I’ll be excited for. Having one block math and then the rest Band, Chorus and German would be awesome. I guess having the same start time and end of school the same again will be nice too, but that is a little conditional. If I can find a soccer team it’ll make things better too…but yeah it’s not too horrible. I guess my main things is that I need to be more grateful for the experience I’ve had and what I’ve done here than to be so upset about what I won’t have. I’ve seen and done so many amazing things that I know I would’ve never done unless I had come here. More over I’ve set myself apart from the average back home; I lived in Germany for a half year! I’ve seen more of the world now than most of my classmates ever will, I’ve made amazing friends here that I know I will always keep in touch with. I’ve had a blast with my friends from outings to Hamburg and Lübeck to parties on the weekends. I finally got to play soccer and for the first time in Germany of all places! Even though I, by far, was not the best, the team fully accepted me as a part of their team. Although I have not yet become fluent in German, I have learned so much more than if I had not come. all are reasons to be grateful. I should count the lasts with gratefulness that there are lasts. About a year ago now I started this crazy journey by telling my dad what I wanted to do. Then it was just a completely mad idea that most likely wasn’t possible, I didn’t give up. Even though there was most likely no chance of me going, I never gave up on my dream of coming here. Now I’ve been in Germany since August. I did it. I have lived a dream of mine and that is something not many my age or any age can say. I am and forever will be an American Exchange Student. This whole experience has done so much for me. I have most definitely matured more than imaginable and that only makes sense when you throw yourself into another country with hardly knowing anyone there. Not to mention I’ve lost weight while here…hehe…that always makes things better and especially when an Exchange Student. I’m just so amazed that all this happened. Who knows all the ways this experience will help me in the future, but I’m sure it will. You know even before I said that I wanted to go to a German Uni people always said that I needed to see if I liked it here first. I guess that question is definitely answered. I love it here and hopefully I’ll go to Uni here and live here in the near future. Well this is how I’m feeling today hopefully it’ll stick that way, bit we will soon see.

1-2-09                                       9 Days till Departure

So today was the last day of Ski/Snowboard vacation. I figured I’d write a but since we have a bit of down time. The week as a whole was awesome. I met tons of new people and learned how to snowboard and in the Alps! It is so beautiful here…well except the place we stayed at…it’s well just…minus fünf Sterne. Of course, we also had News Years here…it was a little boring, but a new year has come. I haven’t really made any new years resolutions, but I think they will come in time…probably when I’m back home since, well, things here are just so great. Speaking of the new year and going home…it’s January meaning I leave this month…in nine days… almost eight now. Yesterday it had me a little distanced as well as today. I just keep trying to figure out what I’m gonna do once I’m back home..and what to expect…and I simply can’t figure it out. Of course…or hopefully, my friends will be happy to see me..but how long will that last and will it even affect me? Like one of my last entries I’ve tried to be positive about the return, but it’s so hard not to think of what I’ll miss so much..which is almost everything..well there’s nothing I can do but make the most of these last eight days.. I know too soon they’ll be over…and that scares me…a lot. I think I’ll be writing everyday for these last nine/ eight days.

1-7-09                                          Four Days till “D-Day”

So Wednesday is soon to be over…my last in Germany for this go round. Tomorrow is back to school for my last two days…and we’re having our class Abschieds Party at Micky D’s plus the English Theater. It’s overwhelming now…how much I don’t want to go back to Pelion. I love it here. Unfortunately, I have to go back and so I’m faced with these feelings. I’ve cried quite a few times since my last entry…all because of what and who I’ll miss here in Deutschland. Oh Deutschland, my land of possibilities. I have so many memories that I will never forget here as long as I don’t get Alzheimer’s. From my first day in Germany to the day I first met my host family. Man oh man was I nervous…then I saw the sign with “Willkommen Kurtis” and there they were in Hamburg Hauptbahnhof, a place that holds many more memories and will soon hold the memories of my departure from my friend here in Northern Germany. The more I prepare myself the sadder I become. Oh the things I’ll miss the simple things…like always. The afternoons of going over to Jenni’s or the evenings after soccer when the guys and I would relax afterwards with a few cold Holstens. All things I will dreadfully miss. Oh! And my party weekends with Justin…man the memories I’ve made at parties with Justin there! I’ll say simply…table dancing…oh and…strip tease. Then my days of singing the FUN song to the girls at the parties . It was always a request…as much as for my wonderful dancing skills. Simply said I’ll miss everyone. Everyone ins a special way too like with Thorben J. he was always happy to chat in English and me respond in German and we both correct each other. Although when it all comes down to it there’s 4 people I really need to thank. For without them I would have never met my awesome friends here. Those people are my host family. Heiki, Sven, Morten and Kira. The heart of my time here . I can never thank them enough…they welcomed me into their home and gave me so much that I cannot say thank you or vielen dank enough for. In fact, if it weren’t for Sven and Heike taking me to the wonderful Großhansdorf Oktoberfest I would have never met Justin, Thorben, Moritz or so many people. All because of my host family was all this possible and I will forever be in debt to them. And that is where I end this entry. Now onto the hardest days I’ve had so far.

1-8-09                                       Three Days till “D-Day”

So back to school today and so far all is good. Actually I think from the looks of it the Kiezmiezen are a bit more upset than I am. anyhow the day is still young so we’ll see what happens. It is strange to hear their plans for next week and think I’ll be in America…it’s really hard. I really can’t imagine it at all, the idea that I’ll be back in America in 3 days is still like some sort of joke. I can’t imagine myself back in America, but I’m sure as soon as I have my small party Friday that it’ll all hit me. Maybe not until Saturday when I travel to my departure city but I don’t know. At the moment I’m definitely not looking forward to Atlanta. Mainly because last night dad and I argued and sorts and I just really don’t wanna go back to that like not after this one. Strange to say my American life and my German life, but they really are so different.                                                            *************************                                                           So the lasts keep adding up….last English class was last block and now my last philosophy block…lasts lasts lasts…they suck. That’s life as dad says, but still it sucks. I’m looking forward to seeing my friends and how excited they are, but then again I have to leave friends to be with friends…what a life. I still don’t understand why we exchange students do so…but it’s amazing to live somewhere else for a semester or year. Absolutely amazing it is. Funny to think tomorrow is my last day of German “high school” and then later this year I’ll have my last day of American high school…totally crazy. At the end of this school year I can honestly say ‘what a school year’ at least. An amazing senior year…half in Germany and the other back home. To think in only 5 or so months I’ll go through the same ordeal of saying goodbye to the good ole days of High School with friends. Scary really…just like leaving Germany. There’s noting I can do though it’s gonna happen and I can only be prepared for it…yeah “prepared” for it.                                                                                                                                           *****************************                                                       Yet another last…my last Math lesson with my German classmates. Surprisingly, I’m doing alright today…I guess it come and goes. Good news for tomorrow only one class of German and then my time at Emil-von- Behring Gymnasium is…vorbei. Gone like my soccer times and other classes….only 3 days. What will it be like to be in Pelion High School once more, the school I thought I’d never attend again. What will I feel…what will people say..who will the first person I see be…will I somehow be excited or completely overwhelmed with sudden grief of missing my German school…zooming out further how will Pelion look or Lexington…what’s changed in the half year I was here in Germany? Then…what will go on here in Germany when I’m gone…and how much will the people so close to me change until the next time I’m here? Will I simply be able to hop back into the party life with Justin…or will Jenni and the girls still be Jenni and the girls…these things worry me. The things that time can only tell and that time can so gracefully ruin. Will they still be the same only a year or so older…or will be have completely changed? This i have to wait out, hoping only for the best.  I don’t know why I don’t worry about the same with my friends back home…maybe it’s because I’ve known them for years and know how to adapt to their changes…who knows..but that I’m not worried about. The things that worry me about back home is finding a job…making sure I can get back to Germany..what I have to do to get back…trying to get accepted into a German University…paying that tuition and the though of no more high school after one semester…its all so scary. Through all that I still somehow know it’s all gonna work out…like it always does. I know I’ll get into a German Uni and somehow pay for it and my trip here and everything that surrounds living in Germany. As for now I have to face going home…it’s also surprising me that I’m not scared about the traveling alone part…Hamburg to Frankfurt then Frankfurt to Boston and finally Boston to Atlanta…all alone…and that doesn’t worry me…figures. I will enjoy understanding every word in my lessons back home and being able to actually participate. Oh and I look forward to the crazy conversations we come up with at lunch…those are always a highlight back home…what we manage to talk about over lunch…man the crazy stuff we’ve talked about over lunch back home. The trip with the band I’m also definitely looking foward to…times with the band are ALWAYS hilarious.                                                        ****************************                                                  So now the last Thursday is soon gone. Boy was this evening great! My class and I went to an English theater piece and before we met at McD’s for an Abschieds Party (Goodbye Party) and well that was fun as well as the theater piece…it was hilarious and then afterwards was also awesome…but tomorrow…that’s gonna be tough. My last school day and then tomorrow evening my Abschieds Party with friends. Tomorrow is going to be very hard and I only hope I can get through it strongly. Saying Goodbye is never easy and tomorrow it really starts. At least I had a blast….that is what is truly important. It’s just hard to tell myself that, well, it’s over for this go round. It’s late…I should sleep tomorrow is the beginning of the end of my time here. I’ll need a bit of rest for it.

1-9-09                                         Two Days Till “D-Day”

Last day of school…start out with a band actually…or crash. The first time I fell off my bike was today on my last trip to school. Although, it was because of the ice that I wasn’t able to break and yeah. The next best thing is that my chain fell off the bike. Wonderful. I fixed it and quickly and then headed back off to school, but the fact stands. Now I sit in my last lesson in Emil-von-Behring Gymnasium and in Germany for this go round. What is ironic is, just like my last soccer game was against the first team I trained with, my last class is in the classroom whee I had my first lesson here at EVB. Yet again the theme of ending at the beginning reappears. Of course, I’ll also be traveling the same way back to America…for example train back to Frankfurt and plane from Frankfurt to Boston. I find these last times that end like the beginning odd, but I like them I feel they fit better. The gravity of my end here in Germany is finally setting upon me. The slow sinking in the pit of my stomach and the strange feeling of sadness seeping through my body. To think back on September first I sat in this very same room nervous as hell with a bunch of German teenage strangers. Now I sit in a room with my classmates. Just like at home we have our insiders together and our laughs during class these people are my friends and the first people I got to know here. Here in this moment I’m filled with sadness at leaving my new class and filled with gratitude that I was so easily and greatly taken in by these people.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And so that was the last entry I made that I have found. Of course soon after finishing that I stood in front of my class and said goodbye while crying. I was slightly embarrassed, but it showed them that they truly meant a lot to me. Later that night I partied with my german friends for the last time and did it right. We had a blast and I’ll never forget it. The next day I rushed to get packing done while Sebastian lay sleeping until 4 in the afternoon in my room. Then the horrible goodbye at the Hamburg Hauptbahnhof. Where I stood in the door of the train crying my heart out while they all waved white tissues in the air saying goodbye. My soccer friends and best friend Justin ran with the train until we were too fast for them to follow. Later on through the red eye train ride I would lose my passport making that traveling I feared something I dreaded once I realized I had lost the passport at the airport about an hour before my plane was to leave. These last days that I wrote about I will never forget like the many many memories from my many months in Germany. So as I go through the day that marks my one year anniversary since I left for Germany I will be filled with sadness, of course. Although I will also be filled with the confidence that I can do anything as long as  set my mind and heart to it. I may have changed plans about returning to Germany, but still the hope and desire remains in my heart to live in Hamburg, Germany. So one day, no matter how long it is form now, I will walk those very streets once more and smile recalling on those wonderful days from my semester in Germany. Thank you to everyone who supported me while on my adventure to getting to Germany and to the friends who supported me in my rough times in Germany. Thank you to my host family who gave me the wonderful home to call my own for that time. You guys truly made the experience what it was. Thank you to Jenni, Johanna, Clara, Claudia and Justin  especially for being my closest friends abroad and giving me those awesome times in the city and at the parties. I know we all will never forget our times together there. Hopefully soon in the near future we can make even more wonderful memories back in my second home in the world, Hamburg or more over Hoisdorf.

New Blog!

It’s My Life as a College Student…yeah i do have a theme going haha. I encourage everyone to check it out as it’s sorta the new phase in my blogging of my life.

So check it out!

Although, this does NOT mean I will not post from time to time here! So always make sure to check this blog as well!

The Call

It started out as a feeling
Which then grew into a hope
Which then turned into a quiet thought
Which then turned into a quiet word

And then that word grew louder and louder
‘Til it was a battle cry
I’ll come back
When you call me
No need to say goodbye

Just because everything’s changing
Doesn’t mean it’s never been this way before
All you can do is try to know who your friends are
As you head off to the war

Pick a star on the dark horizon
And follow the light
You’ll come back when it’s over
No need to say goodbye

You’ll come back when it’s over
No need to say goodbye

Now we’re back to the beginning
It’s just a feeling and no one knows yet
But just because they can’t feel it too
Doesn’t mean that you have to forget

Let your memories grow stronger and stronger
‘Til they’re before your eyes
You’ll come back
When they call you
No need to say goodbye

You’ll come back
When they call you
No need to say goodbye

The song is “The Call” by Regina Spektor. It was my “theme song” for leaving my friends back almost a year ago now, but after hearing it today in the context of the movie it was from I realize it is still my “theme” and will be so for a long while. With the year anniversary of leaving for Germany soon and as I move on to college it reminds of so much. The lyrics are very powerful for me as eve the beginning was exactly how I got to Germany. It start out as a feeling…which then grew into a hope..which turn into a quiet thought then into words and progressing on and on until no one could stop me from getting to my goal. Although now the process is once more starting over, but one phase of this song of my life remains to be fulfilled.

So now we’re back to the beginning. The next few lines of the song are most important to me now:
“It’s just a feeling and no one knows yet
But just because they can’t feel it too
Doesn’t mean that you have to forget”
Even though I cannot truly describe the feelings I have for returning to Germany, my friends here try to put the reasoning towards other parts of my life. It makes me want to forget it all together, but like the song says I don’t have to. Recently my plans for returnign have ben changed and changed oh and changed once more, but to my friends there in Germany I say, “You’ll come back
When they call you
No need to say goodbye.”

I know you guys want to see me, and I speak to one person individually at this point, but don’t worry I will return as I promised. I’ll come back when you call me there is no need to say goodbye. We will see each other soon enough.

I am hoping that maybe this short and random post will give yuo an insight into how I feel. The song is perfect and if you haven’t heard it well..I’ll link it right here. I also hope that ‘ll be able to find my old writings from my last few weeks in Germany and post them here on August 16th, the day I left for Germany in 2008.

Life Goes On

Well, it’s a late night tonight. I can’t really sleep and well I felt a sudden urge to write come on and I figured this is always the best place to splurge about. A few updates about whats going on here since the return to America. Hm let’s see…well school is chugging along now. I managed to squeeze through the nine weeks with a ‘C’ in Pre Cal and at this point I’m just looking to pass and graduate so that was a good grade. I feel like since returning I’ve lost a certain spark about me. Maybe it was Germany, the life, the people and the major amounts of fun. Even days at the house when I would help my host mom whip up a salad or when she would dance around the house crazily ( I would post videos, but I promised not to). Those were the days.

 For now I live day to day thinking about the mundane things here lately prom and sorts and how much I don’t care for them much. Although right now things have turned around and will be so for the next two weeks or so. A really great friend of mine from Germany is here to visit me and even though so far we’ve been stuck around here it’s just nice to have her around. It makes me feel like…well that it was just a dream that I woke up from. It also makes me feel, well, special. I mean she chose to come her as a birthday present. If that doesn’t make ya feel special then I don’t know what does. I mean seriously! I’m just hoping right now that I get to show her around SC a little more. I think from our two days stuck at this house that she has gotten to know it well and…yeah there isn’t much to do now. We’ll see though.

Of course, Jenni being here is the dominant thought on the down times, such as now when she’s asleep, I go back to my mundane thinking. I have to say though that since she’s been here I have been thinking more about Germany and how much I really do miss it and my life style there. Sometimes I think that well…I like it too much and that this is even a bad blog for CIEE since I’ve fallen so in love with my host country that I talk about missing it more than how I’m coping >.< But that I am doing.

Being back is definitely more of a challenge than raising the money and getting to Germany ever was. Now that I’ve experienced such freedom and having so much to do in my free time in Germany, being here in a small town lacking of everything I had there is getting to me. I guess before it didn’t bother me as much just because I had never experienced anything else, but now it’s becoming unbearable. This is also starting to…suffocate my personality as well. Not being able to get out and do what I love to do is just causing me to become a grumpy old fart. Things are slowly going back to their old way and well I know sometimes it’s good, but not in this case. Relationships are once more being strained and well my thoughts are becoming more and more negative. I know that it is both me and the people around me at fault, but I wonder what it is about me that causes me to be so. Seeing as I can only fix my side of the problem I think I should figure this out quickly, but at the same time do I really want to? I just think I need to get back to Germany. Even if things aren’t the same as before when I was an exchange student; I will be away and being my own person which I know I can do better there than I ever have here. It’s like…starting over which is good sometimes, especially depending on your past and how much of it was out of your control. And no it wouldn’t be running away in my book. 

So now that I have ranted randomly a bit about well…feelings clouding me I think I’ll wrap this up. Hopefully, I’ll be posting another new blog in the next few weeks covering what Jenni and I did in our time together here on the other side of the ocean. Until then I hope everyone takes care and that Spring arrives soon for everyone like it has here!

Kurtimus

The Most Significant

Well it’s about time I get to posting another blog…now that I’m receiving a bit more traffic from the wonderful guys at CIEE I think it’s good for me to post more about the return life and coping ..ya know that great stuff. Well this post is actually focused on an assignment given last week in my Pre-Cal class. Our assignment was to write a minimum of 3 paragraphs covering a couple of questions. The one I chose was one I thought would be very appropriate to blog about. This is actually amazing because she said I could just blog it and then send it to her via email…so yeah I need to get it done. Psssst procrastination sucks hehe. Anyways the question in fact was  ’What is the most significant thing that you have learned in the past week?’ Well this was a nice one because well the thing I learned, which I continue to learn over and over again, is that people are amazingly nice. I mean there are exceptions, but at the time this question was posed a number of unexpected things happened. 

These were , of course, random acts of kindness from the people around me. Not only my friends, the family of those friends and then basic strangers as well. From being offered a ride by someone who I thought to be completely unlike that sort of person. (Yes, I know we’re not supposed to judge people. I’m sorry, I’m human.) It certainly was surprise though. Then a family member of one my friends, very randomly, gave me 40 dollars to redo my hair in the national colors of Germany. That was superbly awesome, but on a side note I have decided to let it grow out or dye it black in order to have a better chance at job opportunities. Still, she told me to keep it to buy myself something nice. I can’t thank her enough for being so kind. It’s really amazing what people will do for you when you ask, or even when you do not. So my lesson is to never under estimate the kindness of those around you.

Yes, I do have the train of thought enough to now intertwine this into the life of any exchange student. You see while abroad this was a big lesson I learned and I think that all exchange students will learn. People are amazingly nice and in times when you’re vulnerable and all alone there is nothing better than that kind new classmate of yours to simply ask you to sit with them at break or to go hang out after school. I know that while abroad I saw so much selflessness to help me and to make sure I was happy and enjoying my time. Your host parents and families are the biggest one of these. These are selfless families that have graciously accepted a strange foreign teen into their home! Thank about it we all know how our parents talk about dealing with us teens…and then think how these families accept strangers that just so happen to be…teens into their home for lengthy periods of time. If that isn’t ultimate kindness I don’t know what is. Then they are those wonderful friends that accept you with your weird foreign ways your “cute” accent. Never can we as a whole thank these people enough for the memories they will help make that will last a lifetime. Okay, so I’ll stop with the cheesy rant, but seriously. I encourage all past, present and future exchange students to take a step back and think about all the selfless things those people did, are doing or will do for you. It’s humbling. Then I challenge you to do the same, help someone out, give a random compliment go out of your way to do something to show that we humans aren’t so bad at all and don’t forget to say thanks when others do the same for you. It’s good for your health anyways, like seriously saying ‘thank you’ releases endorphins into your body which make you happy and happy is healthy!

Oh and yes like every blog of mine since being back I’ll once more say the compilation blog of those journal entries of mine will be coming shortly we’re moved into a new house and I’ve got a room now with all my wonderful papers and assortments so I can finally find all of them and begin to compile. As far as my reversal culture shock. It’s going, not a day goes by that I don’t think of Germany and my wonderful time abroad, but as said it humbles and makes me sad lol. I’m just so grateful it happened…and it was said to be impossible. Anyways, it’s not too bad since I’ll be heading back in August again heh! So that’s gonna conclude this one and well I hope it’s up to the standards of my Pre-Cal teach..since this is a grade heh. Hope she finds motivation and inspiration enough to give me an ‘A’…jeezums I need it heh.

Till next time!

Kurtimus

Ein Monat

Well as of today marks one month since I’ve been back in the United States. A whole month which has honestly gone by pretty fast and I’m happy about that part. Since being back I haven’t accomplished much, other than making it to school everyday. I have, however, spent a good bit of my time with friends which really helps with the longing to be back in Germany. The major problems I have had since being back is majorly the freedom of being able to do anything when I felt like it. Such as going to Hamburg when I was bored or going to see friends as I pleased. These things I can’t do as easily due to the fact that the only way to get around easily and safely is by car. Something I am currently lackign as well as the license to drive this car that I don’t have.  Secondly, major problem is lack of privacy. Due to our living arrangements at the moment I don’t have a room something I had in Germany as well as my own bathroom so it’s been a big big change. Something else, which isn’t as pressing, is not having the wonderfully healthy and delicious meals my host mom cooked. Man was she an amazing cook!

Anyways, life has gone on here mockingly fast yet slow. I have luckily kept in pretty good contact with my friends in Germany, but the time difference presents problems from time to time. Usually on Sundays I chat a lot with them and my host family as well. I can’t wait for the day that I return to that amazing life of mine in Germany. Never was I so happy and now I’ve lost that everyday ‘I’m living a dream and life is great’ happy feeling, but I’m working on a balance to enjoy myself as much as possible while in the void between going back.

Also, school is going well. Boring at times, but bare able enough. My main class to take is Pre-Calculus and well my mind has never accepted math and it’s keeping up with its track record. My other classes include the musical morning  of Piano and then followed by concert band and jazz band. The day ends with German 2, and no I’m not being cheap and taking the class over with my new knowledge, I’m teaching in absence of the German teacher. The teacher was involved in a car accident and has endured many surgeries and will not be able to continue teaching until what looks to be March. So this semester I have been the German teacher, and let me tell you I have a new respect for teachers. Such as the whole staying up late to get lesson plans ready in hopes that you can keep the classes attention and actually teach them something and all those sorts. It is definitely an eye opener and is challenging me , but I have some new steam and I’m going to give it my all until Mr. Samuel is recovered well enough to take back over.

As for now that is all. I’m sure there will be plenty more to come in the following weeks such as the massive blog with the diary entries from before I left Germany so say tuned! I hope you’re all great and till next time!

 

Kurtimus

They don’t lie

Well when they say you’re going to have reversal culture shock and homesickness they weren’t kidding.  I guess now I’m out of the ‘Honeymoon’ stage with being back and day by day I get more and more frustrated with being back. It’s been nothing less of a big change and that is for sure. From a life of complete freedom of being to go as pleased to being constrained to a house because of no car and no license changes things. Especially when you’re having to live with another family and you have no room. A big change from having a room of my own and not to mention bathroom. Did I mention how awesome my Host family was? I mean once I got over my leap of homesickness and found my friends…I was happy. A happy I had never known before and now…it’s gone. Replaced with aggravation and frustration.  It comes down simple to these words something that I know has to be true. I just don’t belong here anymore.

And so I’m back…

Back from Germany that is…yes, for those few who read that are farther away,such as my friends from eduFire, I have returned. First I’ll tell you, like I have for the millionth time now(I don’t mind), why I’ve come home. You see I’m missing one requirement for my diploma  and that is one math class or credit. Well my school district does not accept credits from abroad or ‘unaccredited’ schools as they put it. I did try to do the course online while in Germany, but it didn’t work..like technical problems. I do admit that I had chances before, but foolishly I let them slip away and so now I find myself back home a semester early. It’s been about two weeks now that I’ve been back so I figured I would let everyone know formally on here.

Of course, I’ve been overwhelmed with emotions of missing Germany and also by well getting accustomed to the life here and seeing all my friends here again. It’s weird…being back…but I miss Germany ever so much. I miss my host family that made everything possible for me there. From accepting me into thier home to granting me a bike which got me everywhere there…to my friends and sorts, it’s all thanks to them. Heck it’s thanks to them that I met half my friends there. If it hadn’t of been for them taking me to Großhansdorf’s Oktoberfest on one of my lowest days I would have never met so many of the friends which I miss so much now. Oh and the gifts they gave me which made my stay even more memorable. Such as my birthday present, which I  here once about, a trip to Munich to see Magda. Or my amazing Christmas gift; a trip to Austria for a week snowboarding in the alps with them skiing. It seems the gifts they gave me all granted me with travel. The bike, the birthday present and my christmas gift. Most importantly though, they opened up thier life, family and home to me with embracing arms, something I will never ever ever be able to thank them enough for. So Thank You Sven, Heike, Sina, Morten and Kira from the very very bottom of my heart. Thank you so much for making my dream come true in every way.

It’s because of them that I miss my friends there. I miss how easy it was to get where I wanted..with a bike! I miss it..here…well I don’t have a car or full driver’s license yet so I can’t anyway unless I go out with a friend who does…a bummer compared to what I could do in Germany. So in my boredom due to lack of transportation here causes me to miss Germany. It’s odd though…with this missing…I feel like I have to go back…of course to see my host family and friends, but  I feel something else. Something that tells me that..something…I have no clue what…but something is there for me. I mean I had planned on going back for studying in university and even live there and work, but now something else is calling me back and I cannot get back soon enough. If I could I would leave June 8th right after the graduation ceremony. I would hope on a plane and go looking for whatever it is there that gives me this strange feeling. Maybe it’s just I miss it so much that calls me back there…no clue, but when I think about going back i get this weird feeling and it just tells me I have to. Weird, huh? Well that means I’ve got to find a way to get back and as soon as possible.

So that’s whats on the mind at the moment…and don’t quit reading or checking up on my blogbecause I do plan to keep it going withhow it is with the differences now and I have a massively huge blogcoming up withmy diary entries of my last month in Germanythat I couldn’t write here since my early return was also a surprise to my friends. So, instead of posting on here I kept a journal of sorts and I’m working on typing them all to post here. I believe that will make an interesting read for us all…including myself so check in for that which should be up in the next monthor so…it’s a lot. Till my next entry I hope all of you guys are doing great both here in America and to my friends who also read in Germany. I miss you guys in Germany and I hope we’ll all see each other soon!

PS: The song that I was listening to while writing this is Comptine d’un autre ete : L’apres midi  you should check it out if you don’t know it already!

München…was soll ich mehr sagen?

Well last weekend was one of the coolest things I’ve done since I’ve been to Germany..I got to travel down to Munich to see Magdalena…but she didn’t have a clue. Oh yeah but first let me explain who the wonderful Magda is! In my 10th grade year she was one of the 2 exchange students from Germany in our school who was in band with us and everything. I got to become pretty good friends with her during that year and well I most definitely wanted to see her while I’m here in Germany. As I was saying…Magda had no idea that I was coming to see her…just like earlier that week she had no clue that Dallas and Jesse were coming too…hehe so we gave her quite a week of surprises! Anyways onto the wonderful weekend it was! It all started pretty early last friday…I had to wake up at 4 o’clock in the morning to get ready to go..since my flight took off at 6:30 I needed to be there an hour early and well…it all added up to waking up at 4, but it was most definitely worth it. The plane ride was really beautiful as well because at the start it was dark and I got to see the lights of Hamburg from above and then as we flew farther and farther towards the great destination the sun started to rise. I’ve gotta say if you haven’t sen the sun rise from a plane…well you’re missing out. It was so beautiful and then the beautiful lands of Germany below us were all white with snow..it was absolutely gorgeous.  So finally the plane landed in Munich and man was I excited!! Well after I got off the plane I have to admit I had a little trouble finding the exit because well it was confusing..but finally I got out of there and Magda’s mom was waiting for me…and we were off! The ride form the airport to her house was full of so much excitement I could hardly stay still..but as we drove by Allianz Areana (Home of FC Bayern München my favorite soccer team in the world)  I was struck with amazement at the awesomeness of the stadium..I had seen pictures and always thought it was cool but it’s definitely something else to see it in person! So finally after being amazed by the wonder and beauty of Allianz Areana the ride went on until we were finally there. Her mom said we’d go up and just ring the doorbell and let her answer the door so we went up the stairs and rang and we waited. The door finally opened and there she was…but she hadn’t seen me quite yet and then she looked over and bam…she started to what seemed to me was trembling and kept saying “too much…too much” so I’m guessing it was a big surprise…wait I know it was. It was so priceless that moment and it’s one I will NEVER forget. Unfortunately she had school that day so after the shocked was over we hung for just a short bit of time in her room with Jesse and Dallas and then she had to go. Well at this point I must say that of course it was totally awesome to see Jesse and Dallas too! To see two of my friends from back home and spend time with them in Germany was awesome and unbelievable! Since Magda was in school Her mom took Jesse, Dallas, and I down to the inner city to show me for the first time and to finally visit a FC Bayern Fanshop..hehe..it was really cool and pretty in the downtown area…after a while though Magda’s mom (Susanna) took us to the 2 hr. city tour bus…it showed us all of the important spots in Munich including the Olympic park and stuff..It was really cool and of course really pretty lol…afterwards we headed back to the house to meet back up with Magda and to get ready for the party. Now you’d think it would’ve been her birthday party since her birthday was that last monday…but no. I was told that she and her friends had decided to celebrate Christmas early and so on the last weekend of November we had Christmas at Magda’s with her friends. It was lotsa fun and well hopefully there’ll be some pictures up on my blog before too long of Munich and some of the party as well.

Saturday was awesome too….of course. We all (Magda and her family, Jesse, Dallas, and I) rode into the mountains and jeeeezums it was…words can’t describe how amazingly beautiful it was! We went on this really awesome trail thing through the mountains that was carve out of water like the Grand Canyon and it’s called Partnachklamm. I really couldn’t believe I was walking through something like what it was. It was like something you would see in a movie..sorta like in Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter…it was soooooooooo awesome and I’m soooooo happy that I go to go there and with Magda, Jesse, and Dallas…and don’t forget the rest of the (s)Kittls! After we made it all the way through the amazing partnachklamm we kept on journeying to the top of the mountain we were on to see Zugspitze with a good view of one of the old Kings summer houses…then we ate at a restaurant with that amazing view the whole time. It was really amazing…and I know I’ve used that word a million times…but hey…it works. After our amazing dinner we headed back towards Munich and Magda’s. It was on the way back that I found out that a lot of my close friends actually do read my blog…including Magda…so this one might be an awkward one for you to read Magda…hehe. It’s really cool to know that people actually do read my blogs and find them..somewhat interesting because well to my knowledge you keep reading them… at least my friends. Anyhow, once we were back we rested a while and chatted and sorts until Magda’s bestie Caro came over to hang with us..and then shortly after Simon (Magda’s bro) had finished cooking our dinner and so we all went and ate. (Btw Magda do tell your bro the food was really good your mom too! ;D ) Afterwards we took a while to decide what we were gonna do but we finally decided to go out for a lovely ice cream which proved to be an adventure itself. First we went to find the ice cream shop Magda knew about and well..it took a while and by the time we found it..well they were closed. So then we had to go all the way back in the opposite direction to another ice cream shop that was opened…but none-the-less it was some good ice cream. That was mainly our saturday night…I did go out later with Caro to a club and well it was a club so we danced and of course that was a lot of fun too.

Sadly the next day was short since my flight was so early so I basically got up packed and did the morning stuff and then we all drove off to the airport. It was such an awesome weekend…but it was much much too short and I wish I could’ve stayed there for an entire week…or more…but atleast I got to go and see Magda, Jesse and Dallas and everyone else. I really really really enjoyed it and I can’t thank Magda and her family enough for being so awesome and allowing me to stay there for the weekend!! Thanks you guys you are totally amazing!!!!

As for now almost a week later…well nothing much has happened. I have done some christmas shopping in Hamburg and stuff but thats about it…oh and it snowed…again. SO yeah it’s just the usual life here..the one that I absolutely love . I seriously have never been this happy in my life! Anyways..I think this wraps it up for now! Sure there’ll be plenty more this month since it’s the holiday season!

Late Happy Turkey Day also to my American peeps!

Kurtimus